1. (This is me speaking to Jake Maloney, mostly copied and pasted off of his facebook wall with some editing.) So I had this crazy dream where a serial killer is on the lose in a neighborhood and the serial killer's MO is to slice open the victim's throat. So I was on the case I guess, but I was in this public bathroom I guess taking a piss and I was really thinking hard about who was the killer, while another man was in the stall taking a dump I presume, and we got to talking. He was asking me about the recent killings and such. I thought I recognized his voice, but wasn't sure. Well I was still taking a piss when he came up behind me and said something to me just as I finished and turned around. There you were with a very sharp pencil thin blade, and you said something evil to me and lunged at me, I ducked and grabbed your arm and We fought back and forth and finally I sliced your neck a little and then that weakened your grip and I got a full on slice of your neck and split it from side to side (Thus killing you with the same MO that had killed your victims). You were gasping and stuff and you walked outside the public bathroom. I know it is impossible for you to speak now, but yet the police had caught wind of where you were and had surrounded the bathroom and you stumbled out and said something. I do not remember what it was, but it was so evil it sent a chill down my titanium spine.
2. My friends and I are gathered in some sort of room having a nice party. Suddenly the enviroment shifts and the world is taken over by Alien Gorilla type creatures (think Planet of the Apes style mixed with a bit of Klingon). Suffice it to say they take over pretty efficiently. But luckily for my friends and I (and the human race) me and an accomplice (do not remember who, think he was Caucasian) find these two guns that can change states if matter not mention just straight up make matter disappear. So we start using these guns to make the matter that is the gorrila-klingon's heads disappear. We dispatch all of them, but then we accidentally turn the entire planet (or at least the room we're in which is a symbol for the entire planet) into water. So me and my accomplice are like, "What the heck? We'lljust recreate the earth." So we end up using out guns to turn the water into other types of matter such as land and etc. So we begin terraforming our planet.
3. Oh I am sorry my third one is very random and although I do remember parts of it clearly if I wrote it all out it would be just too scattered and confusing. Just to give you a little something, it is split up into mini-dreams. One invlolves their being a very big fire in an auditorium (not the IMSA one) but it was full of IMSA kids, and so we struggle to run out. The second involves me going to a new school and having to try to fit in there (awkward). The third is interconnected with the second but involves me blackmailing Kenneth "Chi" McBride (Google image that one, you know him) into giving me 50 pieces of fried chicken, because he worked at a fried chicken shack. The fourth involves a schoolwide skip day in which I didn't know so in order to escape I use the fried chicken box and get someone to mistake it for a bomb and walk home. The fifth involves a schoolwide assembly and one long speech was being said except it was broken up into parts and teachers and some students got to say parts of it. I read my part and it was the corniest one ever. It was filled with ridiculous puns that fade from my mind. Now the school was very free spirited and did what they want, so as the speaker before me was talking everyone started to leave. Sarah Trevor was sitting on stage with the orchestra (they obviously were trapped and could not leave) and asked me why I wasn't leaving and I showed her that I was a speaker. I remember wondering why they chose me to speak. Any ways I got on stage, and I messed up my first line. Then I woke up and was glad because embarrassments in dreams are not real ones. So now I leave you with one of my favorite XKCD's.
It is titled "Every Damn Morning"
